22.6.07
= that's it. =
this is going to be long.real long.
band camp 14-16.6flew by so fast.3 days,but it was so fast.
it feels good to be banding continously except for the breaks.
it feels good to be banding with these people,the J2s and fellow J1s.
how many more chances would i get to band continously like that?
a few more if i count only the J1s.
no more if i want to count the J2s in.
night games was a mass of hysterical.
it was supposed to scary wasn't it?
but we laughed our way through.
i know i enjoyed it.
tune in was not much different from the previous tune ins that i attended,but the thing was this time,i was not a tune in-er.we broke the kfc lunch 'tradition'.
the sleeping late and waking early part was not that nice cos i'm a sleep in-er.amazing i managed to even wake up,or even stay up till 12 plus to mug on the 1st day.hoh.proud of myself.but it's not lasting.tried to candid the J2s for the calendat,but couldn't manage to candid evelyn and puay bing...much regretted.and candided a really really spastic photo of dominic.
monday 18.6banded from 9 - i have no idea what time.then went lunch w yuyan at lot 1 long johns.the tpt in a soft case is so super light. >.< makes the horn in a soft case feel like a boulder.went to print the photos.and realised dominic deleted the spastic photo and jefri did't stop him.... how could you? >.< the best spastic photo ever.
tuesday 19.6banded,then went for buffet lunch at sake sushi w the section plus shaun and kelvin minus dominic.and we ate and ate and ate and ate and ate and died and watched kelvin,puay bing and shaun eat and eat and eat and eat and continue to eat...amazing.....and estimate it's aroudn 20 plates per person.with alot of random "family" photos of rebecca,qianqi and jefri,with the phone nearly going into the kitchen via the conveyor belt,with the stuffing and stuffing and the horrible[evelyn puay bing declared] black sesame mochi,the dominic's 3 plates and the 6 pieces of watermelon per person.
went to Art Friend to get stuff for concert gift and gladys heng owes me ard $24 now?yes.you owe me ard $24.i'll remind you again don't worry.
went home and rushed concert gifts.made the horn for the section and wrote notes to the rest of the band. 1 1/2 inch per paper. >.< by the time finished w the horns,fingers were hurting slightly already.like if you hang a metal hanger on you fingers with a super huge weight on the hanger.
arranged for the J1 horns to meet at Vivo at 9.30 am to complete the gifts for the J2s.
wednesday 20.6 concert dayturns out jefri couldn't make it,sean was late and heng was waiting for sean.and i ran around vivo trying to find glue cos i forgot and went around L1, got lost, found my way and went to L2,and met rebecca,qianqi and jefri.ad found a book store which sells literally books and nothing else.
and so went around and finally,found,daiso.
and got the glue at daiso.[how could i have forgotten?!]
met w the rest at long johns[again] and was binding and pasting and filling in the boxes w gladys.ya.it was supposed to be a surpris,but i guess a surprise made in front of them wouldn't be a surprise anymore. >.<
went back to school and we were late. by a few minutes,was worried i forgot something,cos it was so little things that i had with me to bring....the files were so light,the blazer,skirt,blouse,tie and shoes all fitted into one coat hanger and one horn.quite scary for it to be so light.
dr lee was quite angry with us i think.for not following.
and the piano felt so in the way.rebecca was beside me,i was beside the piano,then when we all played loud it was like surround sound system?the sound from the front from dominic,the sound from the left from rebecca,right from myself[reflected by the piano] and back from percs. >.<
what i feel is that this concert felt quite slack.considering that the band only played two pieces,and some of us only one[scheherazade],so it was really just one final 45 minute piece for us all to enjoy each others' presence and music.the music although not perfect was coming from our hearts,for most of us if not all.the 45 minutes didn't feel like eternity.the last piece that we have to enjoy together was just gone like that.
i don't know how the audience felt about our music,but at some parts of the piece,the music just comes alive and appeals to you emotions,doesn't it?i really like pieces like these,which requires much musicality and is emotionally draining.
J2sthank you for the short half a year of music making.i woke up in the middle of my sleep and started crying cos i just fully realised that that was really the final time we had to play with you all and it's gone.thank you for all the music,the lunches,the dinners,the concerts, and even just the presence of you all.it's so fast.all the best for all your papers,your As,Ns and whatever else.come back often to visit us,if not just to sit there and listen to us play while studying.i know we'll welcome you all with all our hearts.
fellow J1slet's buck up together.i don't think lotr or any other future pieces are going to be any simpler than what we have been playing,but we can make it.we won't just make it,but we'll surpass it and make the J2s,the J3s onwards,the future accband-ers,the teacher in charges,the school,singapore,ourselves and especially dr lee proud of us.we'll show them that we won't let them down.we'll show switzerland and others how power accband can be.i know i don't want to let them down and i'm sure you too don't.the following year will fly past so fast and soon we'll be in their shoes and we may cry,we may miss the band,but let's allwork hard now so we will not regret it when it comes.
well,what i have left to say is enjoy whatever there is now and hope we survive terms and prelims.
Labels: band camp, J1s, J2s, muse, music, thank you
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15:30
leaveheart.. 0
24.3.07
from the case file of enjia's lifesyf auditions on the 13th April.will i make it? tosca shepherd's call is not well played all except one of all times,feste romane horn's melody lines am not able to play well,i can't play all the really important parts well.
my stamina is so low,so much so that i cannot sustain through the pieces,through tosca,is already dead and out of breath,through march is already trying to survive,through pantom after that is dead already by the end.
my tuning is inconsistent,always nearly there,but slightly sharp or slightly flat fluctuatingly,rarely do i manage to hold a constant note.
this morning i went t school 1hr early to go to the rooftop garden to practice so that i may develope my volume better in an open space.however,when i asked sean,jefri,huiling they all if they heard a horn while they walking into school,all didnt.was also practicing with a mute yesterday,from aft e mbti thingy to ard 6 plus,trying to play forte through for roman feste and all parts w loud parts.and the result?still a sucky soft and thin tone.
sitting on the right of sean during march is depressing.i can hear that he's loud and his tone is not that thin,so much so that when he stops playing in the middle of a horn part,you can so obviously hear that someone has stopped even if you're not looking.he's so loud that i can't even hear myself.and when he stops,the thin sound will emerge from my horn.
tosca G# B-B is also very thin,the low b's tone just does not match up to the G# and high B's tone.how can i improve?in what way can i improve.
i've been trying really hard to use my diaphragm and use loads and loads of air,so much that i become breathless really fast,but my tone's still thin and rubbishy.
been playing to much highnotes that i cannot reach well and sitting much too straight while doing so.dont know if it's true,but my back hurts when i'm trying to play march's FA CFA CFA the high range,and plus i've been practicing that the whole week,without much progress,plau yesterday's sleeping in the wrong position in the qm room,plus today's practice,it really hurts..
very hard to fall asleep too.when i'm trying to fall asleep,when it's very quiet,the music of band will just play in my head and the fingerings play in my head,my fingers unawaringly will finger it out.if it's noisy ad i listen to the music from my phone,then same things occur...i guess that it's good since it's never happened to me before previously..
colonial,horn's nicest part,from beat 4 bar 36 to bar 42 beat 2 is super nice,but once again,i'm not able to play it well.high high Bb...stopped notes originally play one semitone down,but unfortuntely we're all super sharp on the stopped notes,so we cn play a tone down and sound correct. >.<
march is tiring! ...
tosca...J's syncopated rhythm we're trying our best to play out,p's agitato's _23_23_23_23 we're also working on it,trying very very hard not to play __31_31_31_31_31_31_31 like the tuba.even if we wanna start corrct,but being influenced by others who ma or may not be aware of themselves playing the wrong rhythm,we'll still be unable to play the correct rhythm.though we feel that we're correct,but we're definitely wrong,as can be seen by the linking to the 123123 rhythm in 273.i'm worried bout I's horn and piccolo solo too.it's thin and and just not there.i dont know what the problem is,but it's just not there.the notes are there,rhythms are there,but something is missing.so missing that it feels really empty.
i was talking to hope on friday and we were both mooning about missing practices(she's choir) and there being really bored without practices ad thing is i've jut had practice the day before and she had 2 days before.i think band's so large part of my life that without band for a day,i feell really uneasy.without band for a week,i feel really out of time,dont know when is when,lost and dont know what to do.though band is hectic and most people who hear about my schedule say : "siao arh?!", it's really something i cannot do without.the last year of sec sch,i was banned from band by my parents,i felt really restless and un-me.
i really have to thank ms sng and dr lee for taking me in from my appeal in to acjc.i've been aiming to go to acjc and join the band since quite some years ago,but some how half way through,in sec 4,i lost sight of this aim and didn't have a goal to work towards.or rather i lost it though it was there.the drift away from band made me lose sight of it,resulting in poor results that did not allow me to go acjc.not that it was totally the drift away from band that caused it totally.most was my own fault for not being clear about wht i want,for not working,for not being firm in my resolutions.thank you alot to ms sng and dr lee for taking me in.thankyou ms sng for taking me in though i told you that it was because i did not study that i got such ridiculous results,thank you dr lee for taking me in though i was not up to the prefered standard,still trying to retrieve what i lost from a year's lack of practice..really thank you alot.
thank you also to my ac band mates,j1s or j2s,thank you for helping me adjust into my new class.though you may not be aware of it,but ya,you all did help.i don't really know anyone in the new class,there's three other band ppl(liling,hanliang,zhanwei) who i know and there's carol. >.< however,in a class of 23 now 26 where seemingly everyone knows everyone and i know little,it's really hard to not to blend into the background nd stay there.hanging around with the band people during breaks for the past week has made me realised that i've not been trying to blend in to the class instead of the background,made me have the courage to go and blend out of the background.
i've been blending into the background so much in my whole life from themoment i associate wit people,een with my relatives, that now i'm trying to blend out of it,it's difficult.among al my cousins,sisters and i,the relatives always prefer to talk to and associate with the rest.i've been told by some junoirs that i look scary(why arh?),maybe that's why,but maybe it's just myself telling myself that i don't want to blend out,don't want to talk to others,don't want to associate with others.till now,i'm still thinking this subconciously alot of the times.but i want to blend out.i really want to.but it's difficult.i shall still try to blend out.why can i blend into the background so well,so much that i don't feel for much,but not blend so well into the band,which i really feel so much,so much for?
sleep is not able to refresh me at all anymore except once or twice in the a week.appetite's been shrinking.hope i'm not getting sick soon.if i should get sick,let it be after auditions and let me recover fast.i'm not looking forward to faling sick anymore.maybe i will be aft experencing pe again.... let not me fall sick at this important point of time,at any important point of life.at any moment i really want to appreciate,to experience,to feel.
i'm tired.real tired.
i'm an ISFP by the way.the only ISFP in 1st intake arts ppl. =.= anyone else's an ISFP?
Labels: band, ISFP, music, syf auditions
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23:18
leaveheart.. 0
